Building self-belief is a journey we all find ourselves on at some point, but it's rarely a straightforward path. Over the years, I’ve come to realise that, like many, I made some mistakes along the way that drained my time, energy, and motivation. Here are three key missteps I encountered in trying to strengthen my self-belief. By sharing them, I hope you can avoid these same pitfalls.

Mistake 1: Relying Too Much on Others for Validation

When I first set out to build my self-belief, I made the classic mistake of seeking validation from others. I thought that if people recognised my strengths, I’d finally start to believe in myself. Surely, hearing positive feedback from those around me would reinforce my sense of worth, wouldn’t it?

But I was wrong. Relying on external validation only created a cycle of dependency. I ended up placing my sense of self-worth in other people’s hands, allowing their opinions (or lack thereof) to dictate how I felt about myself. When that validation wasn’t forthcoming, I felt empty, frustrated, and even more doubtful. It took me time to understand that true self-belief must come from within. Nobody else can give you the inner assurance you’re looking for. I learned the hard way that self-belief is an internal journey—and it’s one only I could make.

Mistake 2: Comparing Your Journey to Others

The second mistake that held me back was constantly comparing my progress to others who appeared brimming with confidence. Whether it was scrolling through social media or watching friends and colleagues, I’d find myself wondering, “Why aren’t I where they are?” or “What do they have that I don’t?”

This comparison trap only served to drain my energy and reinforce feelings of inadequacy. The more I focused on other people’s achievements, the harder it became to acknowledge my own. Eventually, I realised that self-belief is a uniquely personal journey. Comparing my path to someone else’s only distracted me from my progress. Letting go of these comparisons freed up the mental space I needed to focus on my own growth and helped me to appreciate how far I’d come in my own right.

Mistake 3: Ignoring Your Inner Critic

The third mistake I made was trying to ignore my inner critic. I thought that if I pushed those nagging doubts to the back of my mind, they’d disappear. But I soon found that ignoring them only made them louder.

What I’ve come to understand is that ignoring our inner critic doesn’t help us build self-belief; in fact, it often makes the journey more challenging. By facing those doubts head-on and understanding their root causes, I began to take away their power. Now, when my inner critic speaks up, I listen to what it’s saying, question its validity, and reframe the thoughts in a way that aligns with a more supportive inner dialogue. This shift has been essential in helping me move forward with genuine self-belief.

Building self-belief takes time, patience, and a willingness to trust in your own potential. It’s about stepping into who you are, even when self-doubt tries to get in the way. If you’re on this path, remember: you’re not alone, and you don’t need to have it all figured out right now. Sometimes, a community of like-minded individuals can make all the difference.

That’s why I created the Best Year Yet coaching group—a space designed specifically for those who are ready to confront their doubts, rediscover their strengths, and actively build the self-belief needed to create lasting change. In Best Year Yet, we focus on aligning actions with values, setting meaningful goals, and working through the limiting beliefs that have held you back.

What I love most about this group is the power of shared journeys. In Best Year Yet, you’re surrounded by others who understand the challenges and triumphs of building self-belief. You’ll find encouragement in their stories, insights from their experiences, and inspiration in their victories—big and small. Together, we focus on making sustainable changes and supporting one another through each step.

Self-belief isn’t a destination; it’s an ongoing journey. If you’re ready to take that first step, the Best Year Yet group could be the supportive environment you need to finally trust in your path forward. This isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress. It’s about having a space where you can grow, share, and keep moving forward, even on the toughest days. And as you’ll discover, sometimes the most powerful way to strengthen your self-belief is simply by believing in the process.

I hope this has given you some food for thought and a better understanding of the common mistakes that can drain your time and energy when trying to build self-belief. Remember, these mistakes—seeking constant validation, comparing your journey to others and ignoring your inner critic—can prevent you from moving forward with confidence. But by recognising and addressing these patterns, you can start to strengthen your self-belief and reclaim your focus.

Your thoughts and feedback are always welcome 😊

If you’re ready to move past these stumbling blocks and step confidently towards your goals, let’s connect! Join me on a journey to uncover your true potential and build the unshakeable self-belief you deserve. Reach out today, and let’s start transforming your life, one step at a time.